Saturday, August 26, 2017
Asleep in perfect blue buildings...
'Twas the night before moving day and all through the apartment it was perfectly packed, clean and ready to go...
Yeah WHO are we kidding here?! I still have crap to throw away and things to pack. I don't exactly want to (right now). Instead I want to walk down memory lane and ponder on the 5 (!!) wonderful years I've had on Rockbrook dr.
I never thought I'd leave this apartment. It was supposedly my "Carried Bradshaw" apartment (if girlfriend was a homebody...) I truly loved it here. I felt comfortable and safe. And as a single woman thats important! I thought I'd stay here until I met "the one" or I died. I really had no plans of leaving! But after some very unfortunate events it was a sign that it's time to go. I've felt I have "outgrown" this place...but I'm downsizing. Boo. It's time to move on. I'm far from work and even farther from fun things to do! And it just hasn't held up so nicely. So I made the decision 2 months ago to move.
It has been a very hard decision for me. For so long this apartment held no memories except for the ones where I watched countless hours of tv with Cruz while we slept or ate. It also held my adorkable moments. Like when I clean and sing a Backstreet Boys song but I change the words to match what I'm doing or my mood. It has held the little memories and victories of "making it" (I put that loosely) through my 20's. But life didn't seem to begin here until Olivia. Here was where it all began for us. She came to my life here and I had to plan for US here. I will never ever forget taking the pregnancy test in my bathroom. I cleaned hoping that the test would show one line but knowing it would show two. And how I made plans to go back to school and find a new career. I felt the most scared and most alone but so very hopeful and full of faith while pregnant here. Out of all of my memories here Olivia will by far be my favorite.
I feel so silly for being emotional about leaving this place when I know my new place holds such a bright chapter for my future. Who knows how long I'll be there. The plan is to try to stay there until I finish with school and finding a career. My future hope is to buy a house as a single woman once I know where I'll land. But that is down the road. Right now I'll just enjoy the last few moments here. As I blast my Counting Crows at 1am.
How do you handle a big change in your life?